Known for riding off the front of group rides only to be caught in the first mile, we got back on a road bike and realized he must win the Donut Derby at least once in his life. Regularly pledging we’re "not climbers," we can be found as a regular attendee of Trexlertown's Thursday Night Training Criterium or sitting on the couch watching Paris-Roubaix reruns. We have been constant riders of the Hell of Hunterdon in New Jersey and raced the Tour of the Battenkill.

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Essay: On the Festive Perspective

Essay: On the Festive Perspective

(2022) On December 23rd, the neighborhood around the offices of creakybottombracket.com was full of excited students and parents at school bus stops to start winter break. At the same time holiday lights flickered on, often a contest of who has gone the hardest on their decorations. In the creakybottombracket.com service course, the asphalt bike was being prepared for the opening miles of Rapha’s Festive 500, a self-motivated cycling event that challenges riders to cover 500 kilometers from December 24-31st. This year the weather forecast was favorable, the plans were laid out, and the motivation was high. Quickly the perception of the Festive 500 changed, as a tragedy reframed what it meant to spend time away from family over the stretch of the eight days.


Each year our Festive attempt has a theme. The first year - and first successful year - routes explored the overlooked haunts of Bucks County’s famous villains, the Doan Brothers. Years that followed included attempting to circle each of the three reservoirs in Bucks County, explore Underground Railroad locations, and research George Washington’s headquarters. This year saw routes seeking to explore the populous schoolhouses in the area, a topic some readers expressed further research. On the first day of the Festive, five schoolhouses were crossed off easily, and the route came close to another handful of locations. It was as if the next seven days’ routes came to mind in those first opening miles. 


December 25 was supposed to be a ride out to family, spend the day, then turn around and ride back. A wet morning canceled the ride out and the forecast predicted much the same headed back. But news of a tragedy not far from us was slowly making its way to our devices- that early in the morning, a house fire broke out claiming the life of a father, his two sons, and two dogs. The mother and oldest son managed to escape. Further headlines revealed the immense sadness of the situation. The tragedy lept from local news sites to national news sites in hours. People all over the country as well as globally were reading about the mournful scene near where we rode for last year’s Festive 500.


The following days became a collection of decisions. A ride on December 26 lacked the enthusiasm earlier in the week. Then December 27 the shift in perspective became complete. When kids in the family asked to play, we played and played and played. Instead of logging miles, we spent time with loved ones while thinking of the sadness read across the country and the globe that took place not far from where those same kids got off the bus to start their Winter Break.


On the final day of the break, the bike was mounted to cross off a few outstanding schoolhouses not crossed off on the final day. You see, even on the final day of the Festive 500, the ride was nicked because a family member was riding nearby and that was prioritized over riding longer. But today the thoughts returned to the grieving family. The neighboring house was destroyed in the fire as well. How do the students prepare to return to school with two empty desks? 


Over the years we have been guilty of tunnel vision in pursuit of athletic prowess. Check the sporting boxes first, then worry about everything later. It’s only been lately that the list of priorities have been reallocated, that racing every weekend doesn’t have to happen anymore. What was sorted through in those miles today were the excited faces of family members who heard that we would play with them instead of rolling down the road and disappearing into oblivion until some random return time. 


Potential schoolhouse on Scott Road near Kellers Church Road.

We snapped a photo of a potential schoolhouse on Scott Road, passed nearly every ride headed north. Though it lacks a belltower and student entrance, it is possible to see the remnants of three long windows on both sides of the building. Even its size looks consistent with schoolhouses. It was overlooked for our lists even up until our turn onto Scott Road, proof schoolhouses are prevalent in these parts.


Winding around agricultural preserves and we accessed Center School Road. At its commencement is an elementary school built decades ago. This wasn’t the schoolhouse we were looking to document, but we caught a glimpse of a possible schoolhouse. The only indication is the bell mounted on a pole out front. The building itself has been added so that it is easy to pass by. The building is roughly in the middle distance of Center School Road, which may be the history behind its name. It could be that it was the middle school of multiple houses. Assuming this is a schoolhouse, its mystery intrigues us.

Possible schoolhouse on Center School Road.


Two turns and we were on Blue School Road. This sends riders past a beautiful schoolhouse with the sign Algard’s Schoolhouse. Per the detail, the building was first put up in 1760 and rebuilt in 1874, making it the oldest known school on our list. The schoolhouse features a belltower with a bell, a porch instead of a student entrance, and is in the shape of the standard schoolhouse footprint. Imagine the amount of lessons accumulated in that school room. 


Before returning home there was one more schoolhouse to strike for the day. We were close to the district where the tragedy happened so our thoughts returned. No doubt some of the houses we passed were occupied by first responders on that night. Many people were out walking, some were in the act of taking up their holiday decorations.

Algard’s Schoolhouse, built around 1760, on Blue School Road.

We turned up Telegraph Road to pass the Hickory Stick ice cream shop, located in an antique schoolhouse. The brick structure has served as a refreshment stop for many hot rides, but today the ride continued on. Two cars in the parking lot signified some were out looking to cool off from this unseasonably warm weather. Catching a tailwind back, we found ourselves in the shadow of Smith School, the building we first passed on Christmas Eve when so much was different. It felt like an eternity ago that the first miles had rolled past this location.


Tomorrow students will return to school much like they did a century or more ago. But for those rare moments where we could soak in the presence of loved ones, we did. The Festive 500 took on a different meaning this year. We think the time spent off the bike was far and away better than covering 320 miles in eight days.

A gofundme page had been in place for the family with a goal of $20,000. The page was shut down as it approached $1 million because of fraudulent fundraisers and threats to the gofundme creator. Otherwise the link would have been posted here.

Essay: On Dry January

Essay: On Dry January

Events: The 2021 Rapha Festive 500 Day Eight

Events: The 2021 Rapha Festive 500 Day Eight