Known for riding off the front of group rides only to be caught in the first mile, we got back on a road bike and realized he must win the Donut Derby at least once in his life. Regularly pledging we’re "not climbers," we can be found as a regular attendee of Trexlertown's Thursday Night Training Criterium or sitting on the couch watching Paris-Roubaix reruns. We have been constant riders of the Hell of Hunterdon in New Jersey and raced the Tour of the Battenkill.

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Events: The 2022 Rapha Festive 500 Day One

Events: The 2022 Rapha Festive 500 Day One

Ride Distance: 30 Miles/ 280 Remain


(2022) There are conditions when cyclists have no business being outside. The first day of the Rapha Festive 500, a cycling event that challenges riders to cover 500 kilometers between December 24th and New Year’s Eve, saw an imploding weather forecast. Even though the first day’s ride was sent indoors, the scenario outside had to be recorded in some form. The tone was set for a Festive 500. It fizzled before it began. Threading the needle is what makes the event so difficult to accomplish.


In the days leading up, the forecast was checked, the high temperature on December 24th was lower. Initially just below freezing, the forecasted high temperature for that day was eleven degrees Fahrenheit. Eleven. The day before, the temperature at daybreak was 50 degrees. In two hours, and many inches of rain, a powerful cold front brought wind gusts up to forty miles per hour as well as a new low temperature of three degrees. That fresh flooding rain froze in hours making many of the roadways into legitimate skating rinks. And thanks to the recent ash borer beetle invasion, many of the standing dead ash trees came down amidst the gail force winds. Driving was dangerous; forget riding a bike. 


For one to accomplish Rapha’s event, an average ride should stretch roughly forty miles per day. Naturally one day off happens, thrusting the daily ride average farther. The event did not accept indoor miles until the Covid-19 lockdown of 2020/ 2021. Being traditionalists, we tend to only brag about the successful outdoor rides. When the first day sent the Festive 500 straight to the trainer, the gusto was lost. One fellow cyclist documented that his Garmin died ten minutes into the ride due to the frigid conditions. December 25th was barely warmer; the trainer resistance was stronger. The bike remained static as it did on December 26th as the roads continued to have large frozen sections. With increased daily mileage demand comes increased chances of encountering icy sections. At a certain point a digital roundel hardly becomes worth all the risk. The Festive 500 was essentially over before it started. 


There are times when the Festive 500 can be exciting: When things align to make the distance possible, or when the weather is awful upfront and we can free ourselves of stressing over the event. This year the decision to pull the plug on it came early. The fact that the thermometer didn’t officially hit eleven degrees on December 24th until the last hour of sunlight made it easy to conclude the Festive was already a nonstarter. Aside from the outdoor conditions there are gatherings and commitments that are prioritized over the week. Everything must be perfect for a successful Festive 500. This year will not be a success.


After a successful Festive 500, an almost immediately failed 500 is the best possible outcome. It’s why we opted to sit on the couch and binge watch a few more episodes. It is how we managed to play more games of Battleship with new players. It is also why the asphalt bike is not in the service course prepped for daily hosings to release road salt. There are conditions when cyclists have every business staying inside and doing non-cycling things for a change.

The cold never bothered me anyway.

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